I got lost within the first 15 sentences – not worth the time to try and follow – – punctuation really helps if you really want it to be read«1» 5 comments«1»Anonymous readerReport 2013-06-16 12:25:16Very hard to read clumped together as it is BUT a great story. xxx video Maybe labeling it “Proof read & Sectoined” Again thanks for a great story.anonymous readerReport 2013-06-15 12:53:55Perhaps a geography lesson is necessary here. A bit of editing, and this story would be fabulous.anonymous readerReport 2013-06-15 01:14:39Giant wall of solid text = not even attempting to read since author didn’t even attempt to make it readable. So negative vote instantly.anonymous readerReport 2013-06-15 00:33:53paragraphs?? So negative vote instantly.anonymous readerReport 2013-06-15 00:33:53paragraphs?? Please break it down into readable sections so I may enjoy reading it again. Maybe labeling it “Proof read & Sectoined” Again thanks for
